A NaNoWriLess Crime Scene Investigation Novel.
So maybe I'll actually look at this as a challenge--complete 50,000 words' worth of these nanonovels throughout November. For sanity's sake I'm going to say that they're all at least 50 words, but not 50 words exactly. Some of 'em might go a little over. Some of 'em might go a lot over, like this one. And they'll start going under cuts, so as not to flood your friends-page.


Down The Hatch

"Are the results of the autopsy in?" growled Captain Stevens.

"They are," replied Dr. Gilliam, "and you're not going to believe this one."

"Try me."

"Well, the cause of death of the 75-year old woman you found was cerebral hypoxia due to asphyxiation, which happened at 8:37 PM when apparently she attempted deglutition of a whole live horse, which then became lodged in her trachea."

"Unusual. Any idea about why she was trying to swallow an entire horse?"

"Yes. Further examination of the trachea revealed that, not more than two hours' prior, she'd managed the complete deglutition of an intact, live, cow."

"A cow? Improbable, but, again, why?"

"Well, as we probed further, we removed her stomach and discovered that before the cow, she'd also swallowed whole and live, a goat--and before the goat, a dog."

"This gets stranger and stranger," puzzled the Captain. "Is that all?"

"Not by a long shot," indicated the doctor. "Examination of the intestinal tract turned up, of all things, a cat. It went down about half an hour before the dog did."

"A cat? What's next, a mouse?"

"No, it was a bird."

"A bird."

"Yes, a bird. Further analysis of the old lady revealed little, so on a hunch we did an autopsy of the bird, as well. We discovered that the bird had somehow ingested a spider, but only at some point after the arachnid had already been swallowed by the old lady. So we went back and examined the old lady, and discovered traces of the spider in her digestive system as well. Apparently the theory panned out, and it had indeed been swallowed by her first."

"So was that it?"

Dr. Gilliam adjusted his glasses. "Well, there's just one minor thing. DNA evidence shows that there was another creature ingested at some point--a common housefly. Its current level of breakdown shows that its presence predates the spider's."

The Captain sounded vexed. "We've been questioning the neighbors and relatives, and no one has been able to shed any light on the subject. So if you've discovered anything that explain this situation..."

"I can tell you definitively the facts of the case," said the doctor. "But I can't guess as to motives--psychologically, it's anyone's guess, and her brain shows no abnormalities or signs of the onset of dementia. However, each subsequent ingestion seems to be linked to the previous one, setting up a chain of events that began with the deglutition of the housefly."

"And what about the fly?" asked the Captain, exhaustedly.

"That's where the chain ends. I have several different theories, but the long and short of it is that I don't know why she swallowed that fly."